Natboff! One Million Years Of Stupidity by Andy Stanton

The Blurb On The Back:

Meet the hysterical, historical folk of Lamonic Bibber …

Hairy cavemen!  Duelling knights!  Fairy tale princesses!  Craft witches!  Victorian inventors!  Useless astronauts!  Talking grapes!  Peculiar doctors!  And a squirrel!

Yes, from 10,000 years BC to the distant future, they’re all inside waiting for YOU.  So sit back, strap on your laughing faces and prepare for the craziest trip of ALL TIME!  

The Review (Cut For Spoilers):

Lamonic Bibber is best known as the home of Mr Gum but in this laugh-out-loud collection of 25 short stories for children aged 9+ (illustrated by David Tazzyman), Andy Stanton gives some of the history of this place (my favourite being the tale of Natboff the caveman and his sidekick Wolf) and then moves into a bizarre and zany future that includes talking grapes that’ll keep readers hooked from beginning to end.

NATBOFF is about a caveman who’s the biggest in Lamonic Babber, only to discover that there’s always someone bigger and hairier who can take your girlfriend and your cave and leave you with a sidekick called Wolf who really likes disco …

THE MASSIVE GIANT AND THE FLEA is a short story that’s to the point.

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: THE STONE TABLE deals with an ancient relic in Lamonic Bibber.

PRINCESS SNOWFLAKE AND THE GYPSY KING is a fairy tale about a young princess, her spaniel Gooseberry, her guardian witches and a very unpleasant gypsy king.

THE STORY OF OLD KING THUNDERBELLY AND THE WALL OF LAMONIC BIBBER is about a king who makes a foolish bet with a crow.

LIFE AND TIMES OF SAINT FOLLICAN follows the miracles of Saint Follican as recounted by the unsmelly Bene the Elder.

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: RÁÕGHÖLDESKVÚLDRR is an interlude about a fearsome Viking warrior.

A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE MERRIE OLD KINGS AND QUEENS OF ENGLAND is a highly informative look at England’s monarchs.

THE TWO FRIENDS is actually quite a sweet tale of two knights who think that nothing will come between them.

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: UPSIDE-DOWN WALKER ON THE BUN SHOP tells the story of the world’s first superhero.

THE DUCKLING AND HIS MOTHER is a cute 14thcentury poem.

‘TIS RUBBISH BEING A SQUIRREL is a comedic play by William Shakespeare’s brother, Terry and set in Lamonic Bibber.

THE WITCHFINDER GENERAL follows the arrival of Strange Mildred and her black cat Bad Luck Graham who moves into Lamonic Bibber just as strange misfortunes beset the village.

LORD FAMOUS AND THE PLAGUE is set in 1665 where Lord Famous faces a choice when the plague reaches town.

THE GREAT FIRE follows the careless pyrotechnic antics of the Lamonic Bibber residents of 1666 …

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: WEDNESDAY O’LEARY tells the story of an 18thcentury vicar.

A FORK IN THE ROAD is a gothic tale of chilling horror as Joanna Vale takes a stagecoach ride home …

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: MADAME STRAWBERRIES is a biography of Lamonic Bibber’s most successful strawberry seller.

THE VICTORIAN AGE is a mostly accurate and not at all made up account of the Victorians and their inventions.

THE STRANGE CASE OF DOCTOR WEMPERS AND MR CRIBBINS is a gothic horror about the friendship between the doctor and scholar, Doctor Wempers and his scientist friend Mr Cribbins, who has started to behave most strangely …

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: CHIMPY ROBERTS tells the story of Lamonic Bibber’s first dustman.

TO MY WIFE, MARY is a moving letter from Curly Henderson to his wife from the trenches of World War I.

BIBBERING THROUGH THE AGES: FRANK NERBLES tells the story of Lamonic Bibber’s first man on the moon.

BRIAN SIX is a story by the numbers set in 1974 (and one of my favourites).

THE FRUIT SCIENTISTS, THE TALKING GRAPES, THE CROWS OF THE FUTURE, THE DISCONNECTED FACE-BUM-DOGS, THE PENCIL PEOPLE, THE NORMAL PEOPLE, THE ELECTRONIC MOIMPS, THE STUPID ANTS WITH HUMAN HANDS, THE UNITED STATES OF BEING A LION, THE SUBTERRANEAN KINGDOM OF THE CANNIBAL SKELETON ROBOTS, THE NON-EXISTENT MARTIANS, CHARLOTTE GLASS, HEXAGONAL PONY, THE GIANT WALKING CHESSMEN, THE CRUMBS OF THE SOUTH AND PLOVER I’m just going to leave you to find out because no summary I could write could possibly do this justice.

NATBOFF!  ONE MILLION YEARS OF STUPIDITY was released in the United Kingdom on 31st May 2018.  Thanks to the Amazon Vine Programme for the review copy of this book.

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